They Don’t All Have to Get Sent to Mom: NESCAC Basketball Roster Pic Power Rankings

NESCAC Basketball Roster Pic Power Rankings

Here at NbN we pride ourselves on giving our readers good, accurate coverage of the sports that we cover. We try to get all our articles out on time to maintain consistency for the people that are actively following us. With that being said, our top 3 articles of all time and 4 of our top 5 (in terms of views) were roster pic articles. We love getting out our weekly articles, but we also want to give the people want they want. Our readers have made it clear what they want, so a basketball roster pic ranking really had to be done. Unfortunately, there are significantly fewer basketball players than they are football or baseball players in the NESCAC, so pickings were pretty slim. Maybe it has to do with the nature of the sport, but I also wasn’t impressed with the collective effort of basketball players in crafting amusing roster pics. As a result of this, there were really only enough quality candidates to produce a list of the top 5 pictures; a starting 5, per se. Congratulations to those schools that were lucky enough to make the list and to those that didn’t: there’s always next year.

5. Emmett Stein ’22 (Tufts)

Stein gives us the classic “I forgot it was picture day” roster pic. We actually saw a similar effort from a Tufts football player this fall in our football roster pic rankings this fall, so maybe bed head is a thing in Medford. I’m having a hard time picturing what Stein’s hair normally would look like, but I’m almost certain it isn’t this. Or maybe the bed head is just a cover up for his apparent lack of an existing hairline – it’s hard to say. Clearly there are a lot of unanswered questions left from this headshot, but the one thing we do know is that Tufts needs to stop scheduling their team photos to be taken before the sun rises. Go back to bed, Emmett, your first class isn’t until 1:30.

4. David Dixon ’20 (Wesleyan)

David looks like the kid who’s just so excited for recess and P.E. so that he can play games with all his friends. He loves kickball and capture the flag and he loves playing Mario Kart for Wii in the basement with his three brothers. David has a perfect attendance record and he brings all his teachers an apple on the first day of class. He doesn’t even know what it means to break a rule, always the favorite child in the family. You really won’t find a more lovable 6-foot-9, 220-pound kid out there. It seems like the only problem for Dixon is that the guys on his team aren’t as fond of post-game hugs as he is.

3. Ronan Schwarz ’20 (Colby)

Now we get to the real contenders. These are the guys who have put in some careful thought and a good deal of time into their headshots. Ronan is giving us some nice facial hair to work with here. I’m a huge fan of growing the mustache past the corners of the mouth and whatever he has going on in the chin region is a good addition to round out the look. Don’t think we’ve forgotten about the soul patch either – a very classy touch. We don’t always see basketball players put in the most dedication to their roster pics so it’s nice to see that Ronan isn’t letting the dream die. It didn’t get him a top spot on the list, but a very fine effort nonetheless.

2. Matt Folger ’20 (Middlebury)

It’s always fun when one of the top players in the league also has one of the top roster pics in the league. He’s nearly averaging a double double, and it’s no secret that this guy knows how to have fun. What I especially love about this picture is that Folger is making a very clear effort to assert his dominance. He wants it known that even on a college basketball team he’s a man among boys. There are some times when we see some pretty weak mustaches, but ladies and gentlemen look at that volume. He goes well beyond the confines of the mouth with that thing and boy is it luxuriant. That is a very full mustache, trimmed and combed to perfection. It’s no wonder that Folger is putting up 15 points a game; I’d be distracted too if I had to defend a guy with that on his face. Very smart strategy by Folger always thinking one step ahead of his opponent. Definitely a veteran move.

1. Anthony Drouin ’20 (Conn College)

After looking at pictures of 14-18 players on 11 different teams, there was an unquestioned winner. It’s guys like Drouin who give us the inspiration to even write these roster pic articles at all. First off, the angle of the camera does a nice job of hiding exactly how high that hairline really is, and his beautiful head of long blonde hair is an excellent complement. His mustache isn’t as full as one like Folger’s, but it’s the perfect fit for Drouin. This guy knows himself well, and he knows what works. It really looks like Drouin missed out on what could have been a terrific lacrosse career, but perhaps basketball is his true calling. It’s definitely one of the only times you’ll find Conn College at the top of a basketball ranking, but Drouin absolutely nailed this roster picture.